What is Counselling? - A Beginner’s Guide
Introduction: What Is Counselling?
Many people assume that counselling—or talk therapy—is only for those who are seriously unwell. You might think it’s not for you or that your problem isn’t ‘serious enough’. The truth is, counselling is for everyone—and you don’t need to be in crisis to benefit from it.
At its heart, counselling is a safe, confidential space where you can talk to a trained professional about your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. It’s not about giving advice or fixing problems for you—it’s about exploring your challenges together, and discovering healthier, more empowered ways to move forward.
How Does Counselling Actually Work?
Counselling usually involves regular sessions with a therapist who listens without judgment and helps you explore what’s troubling you. This might involve reflection, empathy, and gentle questioning to help you gain clarity.
Sessions are typically weekly, but can also be fortnightly or monthly depending on your needs. Over time, you may begin to understand your emotions more clearly, notice patterns in your behaviour, and develop new tools for coping and healing.
Why Do People Seek Counselling
People come to counselling for all sorts of reasons—to better understand themselves, process difficult emotions, or get through tough times. These might include anxiety, depression, grief, relationship struggles, low self-esteem, work stress, trauma, or simply feeling stuck. Life can feel overwhelming sometimes.
You don’t need to be in crisis to seek help. Sometimes, you just need a space to reflect and process—with someone who truly listens.
Different Types of Counselling Approaches
There’s no one-size-fits-all model for counselling. In fact, there are many different approaches, and you may have heard of a few. For example:
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) focuses on how your thoughts affect your behaviour. It’s commonly offered through the NHS, often over six sessions, and helps you challenge unhelpful thinking patterns.
Person-Centred Therapy is led by your experiences and feelings. The counsellor walks alongside you, believing you are the expert on your own life.
Psychodynamic Therapy explores how your past—especially your childhood—might be shaping your present behaviour and relationships.
Each approach offers different benefits, depending on your needs. But research by Mick Cooper (2016) shows that the specific type of therapy is less important than the quality of the relationship between client and counsellor. Empathy, trust, and being truly heard—these are the key ingredients that make therapy effective.
What Happens in a Counselling Session?
Not knowing what to expect from a session can feel daunting. Most sessions last around 50 to 55 minutes and happen weekly, either in person, online, or by phone.
Depending on the type of therapy, the session might involve open conversation, structured exercises, or reflective questions. I might ask about events in your life, your relationships, beliefs, or coping mechanisms. But you’re always in control of what you share.
It’s normal for it to take time to build trust. Everything you say is confidential (within certain legal limits), and the space is always yours to use in a way that feels right for you.
Who Can Benefit from Counselling?
Everyone can. Counselling isn’t just for people in crisis—it’s for anyone who wants to grow, heal, or understand themselves better. At any point in life, it can offer support, clarity, and connection.
The Role of the Counsellor
Counsellors aren’t there to judge, diagnose, or tell you what to do. Our role is to listen with empathy, offer support, and hold space for your emotions without trying to ‘fix’ you. Most counsellors genuinely want to help you live your best life.
What you share in counselling stays there. It’s a private, respectful space—and your boundaries will always be honoured.
Find the Right Counsellor for You
Finding the right counsellor can take time—so don’t worry if the first one you meet doesn’t feel like a good fit. Look for someone whose approach, experience, and presence make you feel safe and understood.
Many counsellors offer free introductory calls, which can help you decide. And remember: your needs might change over time. You’re always allowed to change counsellors, ask questions, or express discomfort—it’s your space.
Myths and Misconceptions About Counselling
Some people worry that going to counselling means they’re weak or "crazy"—but that couldn’t be further from the truth. It takes real courage to ask for help.
Another common myth is that therapy is only for severe problems. But in reality, anyone can benefit from having a neutral, compassionate space to talk and be heard.
Counselling vs. Other Forms of Support
Counselling is different from getting advice from friends, or working with a coach or mentor. While those supports can be helpful, counselling offers something unique: a non-judgmental, confidential space led by a trained professional, whose only agenda is your wellbeing.
It’s normal to need time to adjust to a relationship that’s focused entirely on you. But that’s also what makes it so powerful.
Final Thoughts: Starting Your Counselling Journey
Starting counselling can feel daunting—but it’s also a powerful act of self-care. Whether you’re struggling or simply want to understand yourself better, taking that first step could be life-changing.
You don’t need to have everything figured out—just the willingness to begin.
If you're curious about whether we might be a good fit, feel free to get in touch for a friendly, no-pressure chat.
